Dear Santa:
Hi! My name is Brad, but you might know me better as Middleaged Mormon Man. I know it has been a long time since I have written you a Christmas letter, and I apologize. I should’t have waited 45 years. Not to blame you, or dredge up old shortcomings, but if you had come through with the bike when I was nine, there probably wouldn’t have been this long of a gap between letters.
First, I need to make my declaration:...
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