CHRISTO V, J. Kirk Richards, 2007

A print of the above portrait hangs in my bedroom — a gentle reminder every day of my relationship with Christ. First, a confession: I’ve never been a huge proponent for mainstream LDS artwork. I can appreciate a sunny Greg Olsen vignette or a crisp Liz Lemon Swindle painting, but they have never been the type of artwork I’m interested in displaying on my walls. A lot of it boils down to aesthetic taste — I’ve always been more interested in art that is less literal.  I love art that reads like a free-form poem, open to interpretation with evocative imagery that might not fit neatly into a specific structure. I was skeptical when my sister offered to buy me a print for my wedding present a few years ago. She recommended an artist (J. Kirk Richards) and let me pick the piece and frame. I went to the artist’s website to see if there was anything I would remotely like, and unexpectedly fell in love with this portrait of Christ. 

I realize that this type of haziness and ambiguity isn’t everyone’s cup of herbal tea, but I can’t help but be reminded of one of my favorite scriptures when I see it:

For now we see through a glass, darkly; but then face to face: now I know in part; but then shall I know even as also I am known (1 Corinthians 3:12).

I am painfully cognizant of that glass these days, to the point of figuratively banging my head against it. I know Christ is there on the other side, beckoning me to see with clearer eyes and understand with depth beyond my current capabilities. For all His pleading, however, my vision is fuzzy and unfocused. And unlike a child that graduates from simple stick figures to more intricate and clear drawings over time, my spiritual understanding seems less clear as I grow older. Sure, the intricacy is there, but the black and white boundaries of CTR 6 lessons are much more intelligible than the grey areas of more advanced theological study. I’ve had to find comfort in uncertainties and obscurity. I’ve learned to accept that I cannot understand all things and that I will be given what I need when I need it (even if it’s not exactly what I want).

More well-known LDS artwork was always too clean cut for me. I’ve never seen Christ with absolute clarity, and the impeccably staged scenes depicted in the paintings don’t resonate with my personal religious experience. I cannot perfectly articulate all I feel and precisely why I believe what I do, but I have enough. And that’s why I love this painting. It’s clear enough to know who it is — my Savior, Jesus Christ. It’s clear enough to see in part that He is there. But the details are left up to me. I strain my eyes as I struggle to focus and understand with clarity, but I am expected to decide some things on my own. To use my agency to make up the difference when the path I am to take is not obvious. I believe, however, that one day I will see “face to face,” that my partial understanding will be made whole and I will “know even as also I am known.” So I keep squinting through the glass.

– – –

Do you enjoy religious artwork? How has your relationship with Christ changed over time?