All my digital life there have been warnings about the permanence of things you say and do. Twenty years ago, maybe it was possible to start a completely new life in a new place... but today, no matter where I go, I carry the baggage of everything the Internet has ever known about me.

Sometimes that's a good thing. If you Google my name, you'll find some of the things I've accomplished - a testament to the reality of what's on my resume. But not always.

Facebook never forgets what you post. Twitter feeds stay forever. And pictures and posts end up in the Internet Archive or Search Engine caches to last for eternity. There have been plenty of people I've known whose less ideal online life has interfered with their real one. Relationships frustrated, friendships lost, and job opportunities closed.

As I merge my worlds, I'll be combining two distinct online personas... and there will be no turning back. In effect, I'll be branded for life.

I don't know exactly what the brand will be. I know what I want it to be - the simple "I'm a son of God." I feel like for those closest to me, I've been able to sustain that simplicity. But for those who don't know me, more likely, it will be some mixture of same-sex attraction and homosexuality, with the gospel and LDS and Mormon mixed in. You don't get to choose how people brand you.

And with that amorphous brand may come a lot of good and bad.

There may be repercussions in my life. Some people may see the brand as too controversial for their firms or organizations, and pass over me in future hiring and selection decisions simply because of it. People may assume that I'm at odds with their thoughts, and set themselves on the defensive. Guys might assume that I'm constantly checking them out, and avoid me altogether. Girls may assume I have no desire to date. Future leaders, without accurate information, may assume I'm unworthy. People in the gay and ex-Mormon community may assume I'm unhappy and unfulfilled.

But I'm okay with that. People have been branded before.

Behold, I have graven thee upon the palms of my hands; thy walls are continually before me. (Isaiah, Chapter 49:16)

And when I was a missionary, I wore a brand on my heart every day. This really isn't all that different.

I feel like this is the right path. I know it will close doors... but whenever the Lord closes a door, He opens a window somewhere. :) And as long as the brand I choose involves Him, everything will work out for the best.
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