Halloween is on the horizon again and that means Trunk Or Treat events in many wards and stakes.

As I’ve stated before, I rather like this event. It solves the problems of Halloween safety but still allows the kids to dress up, collect candy, and so forth.

Single people have limited Halloween options. Trunk or Treat is an opportunity to participate in a Halloween event that is otherwise closed to them. Or is it?

Confusion

I’ve never participated in or attended a Trunk or Treat event myself. My knowledge is limited to the occasional pictures I see online. It would appear that people decorate their vehicle trunks, dress up and hand out candy. I can glean little more.

I’ve seen some pictures where the event occurs in parking lots, but occasionally on grass. How does that work? Does someone direct people where to park? What are the expectations and norms?

I’m still wondering about these particulars.

My BIGGEST question though is how many kids and how much candy to bring? I wish I could get an answer to that question.

Having no children of my own and not having served in Primary, I have no clue how many little trick or treaters to prepare for.

Why doesn’t the publicity information ever include this information? It’s crucial.

One year, soon after my stake’s ward boundaries were drastically altered, they suddenly included another ward in our event at the last minute. I panicked. That ward was slightly more than double in numbers what my own was. Obviously, I would need more than double the candy I’d planned on. For that reason, I decided not to participate. Nobody ever updated the numbers to let us know what to expect.

Resignation

So, I haven’t participated. My dilemma is that nobody ever provides enough information for those of us who are clueless to participate, and they never seem to care that we don’t have it.

I guess the people they want to participate have the necessary information. I certainly don’t and I’m not likely to get it unless I specifically run down someone who has that information that can, or will, tell me.

Since the person who keeps announcing this cryptic information in my current ward simply ghosts me on other issues, I’m doubtful I can obtain it from her. I see no point in trying to run down anyone else.

The current generation simply ignores people they don’t want to respond to, so why should I bother asking anymore?

Message received.

Despair

There are other concerns, of course. In our present societal climate, if you try to interact with children that are not your own, you are viewed with suspicion. Men have to be more careful than women, but we have to be careful too.

I learned this lesson right after my husband died. In order to cope with my grief, I went walking a lot. I lived right next to a city park and could fall out my front door and go walking any time I wanted. I liked to end up at the splash pad at the park.

Watching the little ones get so excited and surprised over an intermittent stream of water warmed my heart in that difficult time. It also engendered the suspicion of parents and caregivers. Why was I there when I obviously didn’t have children or grandchildren of my own? I rarely stayed long.

It’s not quite as bad at church, but it still exists. If I try to interact with children, parents still regard me with suspicion and often hurry their children away. Occasionally, they say, “Let’s not bother Sister “fill in the blank.”

They teach their children not to talk to strangers. Well, I’m a stranger, even at church. I don’t want to undermine parental teaching, but I wish parents realized there is collateral damage with that instruction.

Being old doesn’t help matters. Old people are practically invisible anyway. Just about anyone under 50 ignores me now.

Complicating matters for me is that I live thirty minutes out in the country. Going to town involves an hour of travel.

So, should I spend time, effort, and money to dress up, decorate my trunk, and hand out expensive candy when I'm likely to be ignored?

Why would it be any different for me at a Trunk or Treat event than any other event?

Message received.

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