This week my father turned 75 years old.  Because of things that happened during my childhood, we have been estranged for many years. I did eventually forgive him, but I haven’t kept him in my life, even though I know he’d like to be a part of it .

Moments like his birthday always give me pause to think about the subject of forgiveness and where I may be falling short.  So for today’s Sabbath Revival post, I present this gem from April 4, 2007 by c jane/Courtney K.  There was a robust discussion in the comments on the original.  What are your thoughts today?

~~~~~

I loved President Faust’s talk about forgiveness this past Conference Weekend. His humble delivery made everyone put down the hashbrowns for a second and really listen.   I even took notes. I took notes because, yes, that is the kind of saint that I am.

I really took this forgiveness concept to heart. I started to think of issues with people in my life that I needed to absolve. I think there is probably a minivan full (as opposed to a “hand full”) of people with whom I need to share my mercy.

At the drivers seat, for instance, might be a friend that never cared to listen to my side of the story. To her right, riding shotgun, is the man that yelled at me when I tried to deliver a package of cookies to an elder in the MTC some twelve years ago. For further explanation, I am compelled to add that this man was full of fire and indignation because he thought I was trying to break the MTC Same Day Delivery Policy. Now, I’ve done some bad things in my life, but breaking the MTC Same Day Delivery Policy is too dark of an abyss. Once you go there, you ain’t coming back into the light. But also for the record, I never try to break a policy. I just do it.

Other people filling the seats might be the soccer coach that roared at me in front of everyone within 1200 mile radius for catching the soccer ball before it slammed me in the chest during a tournament game. He sits by another friend who told me I was “sloppy” then signed a “Top Ten Snobs” list with my name at the top during high school. Just for the record, are snobs sloppy? I didn’t think so.

But are saints sloppy?

I mean, it’s not like I am going to sit here and type on and on about everyone in my personal minivan of The Unforgiven. But I do have to mention the girl at Blockbuster the other night who bowled me over ”“using a typical shoulder maneuver—while my husband and I were in line. She had the worst wig-o-nest-o-rats coming out of a high-centered ponytail and I said to my husband right then and there, “I will forgive her for pushing me. But I will not forgive her for that hair abomination.” And boy did I think about that all night. Still am…

(Please scoot over so the Blockbuster Girl has a seat!)

But here is my question. If I forgive all of the people in my minivan, from the seat-belted ex-boyfriend to the bossy neighbor, does that mean that I have to be willing to carpool with them? Couldn’t I just cheerfully wave them on their way? Kinda like “I forgive you. But from now on, I am taking the bus.”

Does forgiveness require that I hop inside and ask if Friendship is on the road trip itinerary?

Because knowing me, I’d be the one in the back yelling “Are we there yet?”